71.Swirl

I think i have motivation issues.
I begin a year thinking. C'mon Jazz, you'l show them your brighter than they think. C'mon lets go up a maths set ect.
But then i get disorganised. I get confused, i fall behind with work and im back at the begging. So each time, i pick myself up, get organised get back to passing, revising ect. I get back to giving a shit.

Then, few months later it will happen again. I'll loose motivation, the will to do well. Ill get disorganised. My room will be a tip. Ill be skint, but i'll have a wkd social life. Homework will be late and half done.

Then, ill get scared, worry and pick myself up. Its a circle that goes round and round, it hase'nt happend in ages but here i am. Yesterday i tided my room, im doing my homework then i'll practice for my singing.

Im meeting up with ellen soon to shop in town. Purchase the final ingredient to self confidence. That makes it sound like drugs. It aint. Ellen knows. I wouldnt be suprised if most girls did LOL.

Oh the fun i have. Schooool. Raf inspection on tuesday. should be fun.


Especially as Jacks coming over sunday.
My grandparents have decided to make a guest experience.

Oh. How i love my grandparents. Oh how i love Jack.

But. NOT TOGETHER! This is going to be. Scary.